Architects’ wives understand that an architect’s work is more draining and taxing than their own job, and most other people’s jobs in fact. And that this means that it is unrealistic to expect the architect partner to share domestic responsibilities and daily parenting duties. They do understand this, but it can be a sore point which flares up from time to time when an architect’s wife tries to give up anti-depressants and becomes unreasonable.
If the architect’s wife is very resourceful and upbeat (ie. not critical) she may be able to organise her husband to attend a sporting event with one of the children on the weekend in between his work commitments, thus ensuring that the architect has some quality time with the child. This appearance of the architect at the school event is very important to the wife, who is secretly shamed by the jokes and asides about her sole parent status.
The architect struggles with this weekend duty. He does it lovingly because he’s a great dad and he wishes he could spend more time with the kids. But he has so much to do at the office this weekend, and a site visit, and also hopes to get to the hardware store before it closes to get something he needs for a job that has to be done in the shed at home. The architect’s wife doesn’t understand how important this job is and when the architect thinks about it, she doesn’t value all those handyman jobs he does at home; like building that incredible pergola and doing that timber fence detailing, or the stone work near the driveway. With a little more support he could do some even more amazing projects around the place.
As the team listen to their coach, this architect dad reflects on all those building projects he’s done at home.